I Blame Bush

"Champaign police were called to Staples, 2009 N. Prospect Ave., late Sunday night and investigated what first appeared to be a hit-and-run accident, according to Sgt. Don Shelton.... While the use of a car to ram a business for a burglary is rare, it does happen, Shelton said."
- Champaign-Urbana News-Gazette

This is just the beginning
of a long wave of
SUV-related crimes
committed by crazed
desperate entrepreneurs
whose small businesses
can't afford office supplies