NEWSPOEM 22 FEBRUARY 1996
Cocktail Party Candidate
Ted Stadt announced his platform today. If elected, he intends to make all currency
edible. The most radical aspect of Stadt's platform is that he claims his proposal
"may introduce more problems than it solves." Critics of the party have noted
that, according to his plan, all money will either have been eaten or have gone
bad two months after he takes office. This complication was quickly brushed
aside, though, when he explained that the currency would be made out of his
father's recipe for chocolate espresso mousse with raspberries and white chocolate
shavings.
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