2 April 1999

Patch Happy 

Patch Adams has announced that he has been given a million and a half dollars by two anonymous charitable groups. 

Patch is seen here with his accountant and four clowns. 

The first clown gave him 25 million dollars to buy a plane and hire some pilots. The plane - Clown One - will travel around the world from trouble zone to trouble zone, providing health care, disaster relief, and comedy. 

The second clown gave him 25 million dollars to build orphanages in Moscow and St. Petersburg. 

The third clown gave him 25 million dollars to form a council that will travel across America, visiting communities to talk about health care and how to prevent the takeover of their hospitals by business conglomerates. 

The fourth clown gave him 50 million dollars to get the Gesundheit Institute - a free hospital in West Virginia - built and open. 

This is the dream come true, as Patch explained it to Ruth and I, on Valentine's Day, when he recited a Neruda sonnet to us, the day we cracked six eggs, and each of them had two yolks. We cracked each next egg in disbelief, and another miracle happened each time, until by the sixth egg we were too astounded and couldn't go on. 

Two yolks in the same shell like us. 

While meanwhile me and my friends overpopulate the theater and scream and cheer and make noise and become famous and build a free hospital and jump up and down on the roof screaming and waving our arms and yelling and flapping freaking yelling jumping clanging grinding capialism to a halt making joy whoopie fun love ecstasy bliss. 

I have requested the position of balloon man on the opening day of Gesundheit Institute. Patch has agreed to this.

Newspoetry at Spineless Books