Tinyman,

They cranked out candidates on an assembly line, Tinyman, for real. I've seen it. There's a long conveyor belt. It gleams. It's made of chrome. The men in suits come down it. There is a constant murmur of rhetoric. Apparati descend from a ceiling of machinery and give the candidates each a different toupee, a different tie, knotted by a specialized mechanical arm.

Did you come from that place Tinyman? Because you are a head shorter than the other candidates and the incumbent. At least. It makes me like you, makes me think you're real. You have a weakness. You're too short. You seem to have a lot of weaknesses, Tinyman. It's made you humble, sincere. Or so I believe when I see you on TV.

Your loyal constituent,
Betsy Albatross